It occurred to me that I would be lost without my food processor, mixer, and other kitchen accoutrement upon which I so heavily rely. What is the opposite of a luddite, anyway? Certainly, I could make something that requires little to no electrically-supplied appliances. I can at least make noodles the old school way, right? Yes. I guess I can, but my biceps are a little sore from the wear. Lesson learned.
One more thing. I'm unsure as to whether or not these are considered egg noodles or pasta. If I could come up with some sort of catchy hybrid term, I would use it here. Unfortunately, all of my metabolic energy is going to repair the muscle tissue strained from rolling out the dough. However, there is one thing I have learned. Why do the Italians talk about noodles not being drowned in sauce? Because, they worked hard for those noodles! You don't drown a t-bone in ketchup, do you (do you?)? Well, now I know better.
2 C of flour
1 ts of salt
2 eggs + 1 egg yolk
Whisk flour and salt together
Mound flour mixture on the work surface of your choosing (the counter) and make a well in the center.
Add eggs to the well..
Take a fork, gently break the yellows, and start to stir the eggs gradually pulling in flour from the sides.
Once there is no longer enough dry flour to keep your little volcano shape whole, pull it all together in a ball with your hands and start kneading for about 5 minutes.
While the dough rests, it's time to problem solve. You have to come up with some sort of bridge-like suspension device that will allow the noodles to dry for about 1/2 hour or so. So, get crafty. I used a paper towel holder and a utensil rack. You can probably come up with a much better idea than I did. Still though, it worked.
There will probably be some left-over flour that did not get pulled into the mix. Spread that around on the counter, get a rolling pin, push up your sleeves and get to rolling. If you have a marble rolling in, use it here. The heavier the better. Flip the dough over & wipe off extra flour with a clean dish towel.
Roll out the dough as thin as you can (no thinner than an angel hair pasta but I certainly didn't get that far). Roll the dough loosely into a log shape and cut into pinwheels.
Unravel the spirals and drape over your newly invented contraption. Let them dry for about 1/2 hour.
Bring salted water to a boil. Add noodles and cook until tender. Cook time will depend on the thickness of the pasta. Check at 4 minutes.
One final note. Should you see anyone come toward your noodles with a giant jug of Prego, feel free to smack it out of their hands.
(olive oil, parmesan, and parsley)